Practicing Awareness of Microaggressions

I remember a few years ago when I was working with a high school back as a volunteer, how microaggression would show its ugly head whenever I would allow it to be. The band director, Mr. D. was a great over the top band man. We worked so well together. The parents would sometimes say we were like a old married couple, went he and I would not agree on something and we would get some what loud while in his office with the door shut.

I worked with the colorguard and I just about fell over one night at practice when a parent came out to the field and said to me, “they are in there talking about you. He is in there with them and he is not saying anything in your defense. They are saying the colorguard would have their routine if those two black women were not helping them”. These same people tell me what a great job I was doing. My first thoughts were to show them my color by going inside and get into it with them. My next thought was how could they say this, they seem to be nice people. We all were getting along. I hurt inside only because he did not say anything in my defense. I still had to work with him.

 I did nothing until practice was over. I went to his office, closed the door and told him “what you see is what you get. I was not black when we talked about me working with you. My name has not change and neither has the color of my skin. If you have a problem with it let me know right now so I can make my decision on what I need to do”. I was kind of close to him, not quite in his face but I did take up some of his space. He looked at me, told me to back up so he could get a drink out of the fridge, asked me if I wanted one because I looked hot, and then said, “We need to work on getting the kids ready for the next band contest. I need you to help me with setting up stuff. The children don’t know yet but I want to make this an overnight trip”.  Need I say more?

I see these things (discrimination, prejudice, and/or stereotypes) are alive and working well in all of us. I know I may step on someone toes here. The reason I say this is that we do not worship, live, or vote together. I feel if we as a society can ever come together, be true to ourselves first, and stop telling the lies about not having these feelings inside us, we may be able to get along. This world would change for the better. This is just my opinion.

Sandra

Perspectives on Diversity and Culture

I asked my mom about culture and she blew me aways with her answer.  I thought she would talk about the things like costumes, festivals, and food. She talked my grandma and the values and morals that she still tries to live by today. She said my grandfather made them go to church every Sunday. No one ever stayed home. She mentioned working in the fields, how they stayed cool under the pecan tree when it was hot like it is now. Diversity to her is when we all, (my family) come together to eat and enjoy each other company.

My friend Virginia who is also my classmate from high school laugh at me because she said ‘girl you know we are like night and day when it comes to culture. She told me about church, (we are both Baptist) but her culture does not say in there all day. The food we eat is so different. She does like greens, okra, and neck-bones and rice though. I had to laugh on that. Her answer to diversity is the different people she works with. Her co-workers are from all over the world.

I learned about surface culture and deep culture this week. Surface culture is all about what we see on the outside or what is on top. Food, costumes, festivals, photos and artifacts are the material things that people hold close to them. My mom and Virginia talked about the deep culture, what is inside of each of us. It is our ways of doing things. Mom tells of going to church every Sunday. Virginia talking about the difference in time each of us spent in church. Diversity is left out because I believe that culture is just that, and it is what we have to respect when it comes to other children and their families.

My Family Culture

A description of the three items you would choose

I would take my Bible because God is first in my life. I know who I am. My culture is inside of me. I do have material things I want to bring, but they are not of my culture. My sister is my rock. She keeps me and helps me when I feel like I am losing grounds. My dogs are my babies. I would never leave them anywhere. I love them too much.

How you would explain to others what each of these items means to you

Because my family is diverse, my sister who can speak several languages will be the one to explain how much these items mean to me if the people do not speak my language.

Your feelings if, upon arrival, you were told that you could only keep one personal item and have to give up the other two items you brought with you

I much speak to your leader. I would have to leave. There is no way that I am going to part with them. I would lose it. I really would lose it. This is a scary thought for me. I have so much that I would lose by letting go of these items. Take me to the next thing smoking on its way out of it.

Any insights you gained about yourself, your family culture, diversity, and/or cultural differences in general, as a result of this exercise.

Materials things are more important at times like these. I learn about whom I am and what I need to survive if this would happen to me. The most important thing is that my culture is not material, something that is on a piece of paper. My culture is inside of me. It is what I have been taught since I was was a little bitty baby. It follows me where every I go.